SONGSOPTOK: Is the
subject of sex taboo in your own personal family and friends circle? Do you
talk freely about sex with your partner / children / friends? If no, why? If
yes, what exactly do you talk about? Take this as an academic exercise, and do
explain.
JULIE: For most of
my life I seldom spoke about the topic as I was molested as a child but of late
with my daughter being a member of the LGBTQ community as well as her fiancé we
have now have open honest dialogues regarding many things.I am demisexual
(meaning I can only feel truly passionate for someone with whom I’ve developed
an emotional connection first)and find there is much stigma attached to those
of us who don’t fit the *Norm*.I am a deeply passionate sexual being when in a
commited relationship and that just means having a compassionate partner who
accepts me as I am.
SONGSOPTOK: Do you think that the society
today is more permissive compared to the time you were growing up? Do you think
it is a good thing? Please let us have your detailed opinion.
JULIE: The media
apparently uses sex or sexual overtones in well almost everything.It is not
helpful when it is demeaning (sex sells) but it is helpful when it allows open
forums.The internet in particular can be a safe haven for those marginalized or
seeking help and in that way the more we connect as human race the more we can
bring these issues to the forefront and start to create a tolerant community
who helps those in need.
SONGSOPTOK: Do you think that a permissive
society is dangerous for teenagers, both girls and boys? Or is it on the
contrary a good thing since it demystifies sexual acts and makes them look at
it as something mundane and normal? Is that a good or a bad thing?
JULIE: I absolutely
can speak from experience when I say being open and honest having good
communication with our children is a must.We talk openly about birth control
and acquire it when they come of age.Having been left in the dark as a child
was terribly hard and I ended up pregnant at a young age so I chose to arm my children
with all the knowledge I can as I prefer they make informed conscious decisions
about something that can have such a huge impact on their future.
SONGSOPTOK: History tells us that sex was not
taboo in ancient societies. What, in your opinion, is the genesis of this
attitude? Do you think that the rise of patriarchal societies all over the
world is the main reason, where man gradually started looking upon the woman as
his own property? Or is it mainly religious, where woman was treated as the
root of all evils?
JULIE: I know that
in my case it was my father who molested me from a young age and we were kept
very isolated as a means of control.Some of that particular taboo would also
have to include a disgust and ultimate denial of mental issues not being
addressed and yes my father was a Deacon in the church (the pastor was also
jailed for molesting his daughter)If we had had someone to talk to felt safe to
express our pain to it would not have gone as far as it did.There is much shame
for the victims and the taboo makes it even harder for them .
SONGSOPTOK: Do you believe sexual attitudes
and acts to be normal like all other bodily functions or do you think that
there is a special significance to sexual acts? In other words, do sexual acts
need to be couched in special sentiments and sanctified by the institution of
marriage? What is your own experience? What is the experience of people close
to you?
JULIE: I believe
religion played a Huge part in stigmatizes and devaluing woman (leaving many
feeling like just a possession as opposed to a valued partner.This was
compounded by the patriarchal society as a means of control and dominanace.I
also believe that the more we connect on a global scale the more we are
starting to see a shift in thinking more tolerance and respect for all beings
regardless of race .I am part Cree and this has always been a part of our
belief system-The value of all life in whatever form it manifests.I hope this
trend continues to enlighten future generations,.
SONGSOPTOK: In your opinion, does the taboo
about sex give rise to repressive societies where men and women feel obliged to
curb their natural instincts and take recourse to abuse, rape or incest?
JULIE: Absolutely,we
live in a time of enlightenment yet atrocities such as rape and sodomy are
being committed against woman at an alarming rate especially in some 3rd
world countries.It seems to be a part of that ownership sentiment that
belittles and devalues the beauty of the female soul.It often seems like were
just valued for another’s sexual benefit and always judged by society for the
outer form .Which in truth is fleeting and has no bearing on the spirit.
SONGSOPTOK: This brings us to the issue of
violence against women in different societies, where women and girls are abused
and raped on a regular basis by members of their own families. Do you think
that the taboo about sex is the main reason for such behavior? Would a ch
JULIE:I know that
in my case it was my father who molested me from a young age and we were kept
very isolated as a means of control.Some of that particular taboo would also
have to include a disgust and ultimate denial of mental issues not being addressed
and yes my father was a Deacon in the church (the pastor was also jailed for
molesting his daughter)If we had had someone to talk to felt safe to express
our pain to it would not have gone as far as it did.There is much shame for the
victims and the taboo makes it even harder for them .
SONGSOPTOK: Have media in general and
Internet in particular played a role in either enhancing or diminishing the
taboo about sex? In what way?
JULIE: The media
apparently uses sex or sexual overtones in well almost everything.It is not
helpful when it is demeaning (sex sells) but it is helpful when it allows open
forums.The internet in particular can be a safe haven for those marginalized or
seeking help and in that way the more we connect as human race the more we can
bring these issues to the forefront and start to create a tolerant community
who helps those in need.
SONGSOPTOK: Do you think that ultimately sex
is all about power and domination, both for men and women? Why? What is your
personal experience?
JULIE:: For some
yes.absolutely and that’s the only way they know how to view the world.For me
it is a celebration of the ultimate union of two souls and must be based on
mutual respect and true partnership(I did mention I’m a sappy romantic yes?lol
) It is the most beautiful way to share a deep profound connection.For me it is
about Love plain and simple.Touch my heart and you’ll find my soul..namaste J
JULIE
ANNA: A poet, a
dancer a star gazer a dreamer of dreams.A mother a grandmother and one small
piece of the beautiful cosmic organism that is humanity.
We sincerely
thank you for your time and hope we shall have your continued support.
Aparajita
Sen
(EDITOR)
Songsoptok
0 Comments
