“Some things never change, but sex isn’t one
of them.” Marcus Field
“Sex with love is the greatest pleasure in the
world; it is repressed because it is the greatest pleasure.” A.S. Neil.
Introduction:
Sex-the three-letter word is perhaps, most
talk about, issue-sensitive, focal point discussion between a man and a woman,
or among humans. Nothing dominates human affairs more than sex; nothing
connects a man to a woman more than sex; in fact, in every day conversation,
sex accounts for more than half of individual and collective talks. In a sex
poll conducted by Gary Langer, Cherry Arnedt, and Dalia Sussman in October
2004, the pollsters found that “there is more sex in America in 2004 than that
of 1950s”; in fact, whatever the findings were twelve years ago, today’s sex in
America will significantly dwarf 2004 findings. Regardless of culture,
notwithstanding religious affiliations, despite locations and geography, sex
occupies a special place in all humans’ affairs. Nevertheless, as pleasurable
as sex may be, as delightful as sex could be, even, as gratifying and enjoyable
sex may be among lovers in coquetry; correspondingly, sex may be sordid,
sleazy, dirty, seedy, dishonorable, more so, ignominious and shameful. From
time immemorial, sex is treated as secret and private affairs, but not without
society’s supreme control.
Sex has always been under society’s
binoculars; placed under religious doctrines, creeds, and tenets, watched by
laws, policed by crafted morals, condemned or commended by ethics, but left to
individual conscience to take a decision on which sexual route to go base on
aggregate knowledge with outcome.
Yesterday in Africa:
In pre-Christian Africa, sex was the backbone
of society’s continued existence; because of its socio-cultural and religious
values, sex was jealously guarded. In ancient times, society built multiple
myths, fear, fence, do-not-do, restrictions, stop-there, and hold-on around
sex. Interestingly, some of these restrictions later formed body of religious
rules and laws that dictated how sexual roles could be played. From age
restrictions, to who, when, where, why, and how sex should be conducted in both
private and public make up more of detailed dossier on sexual relation in the
society. In many cases, society set sexual standard and behavior, limiting
relations to couple, including polygamous relationship, outlawed and condemned
rape, incest, sodomy, pederasty, lesbianism, bestiality. Punishment on
infractions according to history was usually, severe; at times, sexual
misconduct carried death penalty.
However, these restrictions, repression, and
taboos did not prevent or stop sexual relations among sexually inclined lovers;
neither did restrictions not stop the deviant behavior. In fact, the moral
force, religious fence, and legal noose only succeeded in making sex more
popular. Despite pleasure and joy it sex brings, ancient society made sex look
dirty, private, and secret; nonetheless, sex perception set the tone for society’s
unlimited power to control sexual behavior.
Welcome Christianity, As-salamu-alaykum Islam:
Post Christian and Islam Africa did not change
the concept and attitude of Africans about sex, rather, the two religions
confirmed and created more fear, myths, and taboos to scare their new converts
from this human activity, which concept is partially known. Christianity stands
on monogamy-one man, one wife; it preaches socially acceptable behaviors among
members. It creates rules and laws that cover biological aspect of sexual
organs, steps toward matrimony and solemnization, marriage legality, legal and
illegitimate child, and inheritance after death in a Christian home. Regardless
of Christian denomination-perception on sex was similar. On the other hand, Islam
allows polygamy-one man to four wives; nonetheless, more restrictions, more
taboos, and more repression. In what appeared to be a new law, Islam placed
sexual related activities on Sharia-“the Islamic legal system derived from the
religious precepts of Islam, particularly the Quran and the Hadith.” Under a
new dispensation, a Muslim woman marries only a Muslim man, a Muslim man is
free to marry a Muslim woman or “Ahl-al-Kitab” a non-Muslim; but not an
atheist, agonist, or polytheist. Marriage and sexuality dynamics changed with
these two religions, just as some practices-child marriage favored by Islam
introduced into Africa concept of marriage.
Sex in Europe: From Pre-Christian To
Constantine Through Middle Ages
Just like other human societies, Pre-Christian
Europe regulated and placed sex under society strich watch, Faramerz
Dabhoiwala, Oxford University historian of note, said: History of sex is
usually treated as part of the history of private life, or of bodily
experience, yet that is itself a consequence of enlightenment’s conception of
it as an essentially personal matter. My concern….is to recover the history of
sex as a central public preoccupation and to demonstrate that how people in the
past thought about and dealt with, it was shaped by most profound intellectual
and social currents of their time. All European nations of ancient times from
west to central, through Caucasian, Balkans, to Dardallenes, believed sex was a
private affair, but not without regulations from the society. Illicit sex was a
public crime; from record of the oldest surviving legal codes, the Hammurabi’s
Codes of Kings of Babylon (c.2100-1700), the code made adultery punishable by
death.
Near East and classical culture, Greco-Roman
treated adultery as a serious offence. Nations in Mesopotamia such as Assyria,
Babylon, Media and Persia did same thing. Ancient Egypt, and the Jews, created
myths and taboos around sex-in order to “uphold the honor and property rights
of fathers, husbands…” From Common Era/Christian onward, sex law assumed a new
dimension Catholic Europe; Ethelbert (c.602) the Anglo-Saxon king of Kent
stipulated fine, “if a man takes widow, not belonging to him, lying with
servants, slaves, women of different classes.” Alfred the Great (c.893) made
murder of an adulterous man lawful; “kill another [man]” he said, “if he found
‘with wedded wife, within closed doors, or under the same blanket or with his
legitimate daughter or his legitimate sister, or with his mother.’” King of
Cnut forbade married man from fornicating with their slaves, “adulteresses be
put to public shame and disgrace, lose goods, have ears and noses cut off.”
In fact, these views plus the seventh
commandment, and the teaching of Church in the first century gave sex a new
point of view that graduated to the new laws of Christianity. From 400-1000
A.D., there seemed to be moral revival in Catholic Europe, “Christian Moral
Code” rooted in “Hebrew Laws of Old Testament” seemed in ascendant. The Greek
word: Porneia or Pornea often translated fornication and “Akatharsia” or
uncleanness became two major terms used by early Christians to define or
describe sexual behavior from pre-marital sex to orgy, violent, sadistic,
bestiality, out-of-human, sexual relation common in Catholic Europe. Also,
incest, masturbation, sodomy (oral and anal sex), pederasty (man and boy sexual
encounter), lesbianism (female to female), polyandry, inclusive. However, the
only recognized sex engagement is within marriage confines for procreation and
pleasure-without contraception and birth control therapies- punishment, very
severe, even in some cases, carried death penalty.
Conclusion:
Sex will continue to generate more debate in
both private life and public domain. Form liberal to conservative, from legal,
social, cultural, religious, and political camps and fronts, opinions on what
constitute proper or improper sexual activities will continue to be polemical.
More important, to what extent can society go on this private and
behind-the-curtain human affairs will remain unsolved; inasmuch as sex has
become part of commercial activities of demand and supply, a great marketing
tools, social and cultural issues, and a global menace.Human society through
social duties will always have pretext to regulate what happens among intimate
lovers or sex-for-money behind the closed door under the curtain.
[SILAS OLA ABAYOM]I
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