SONGSOPTOK: What,
in your experience, is the status of a girl child in the family? Is she treated
in the same way as the male child? If not, what are the major differences in
treatment?
KOLPITA
BASU: The status of the girl
child in Indian urban middle class families has definitely improved. Right from
giving the perfect nutrition to equal education opportunities, there seems to
be a parity in treatment. Since there are more working mothers in the household,
there is greater awareness towards equality. Also, more working mothers have
ensured more income in the household, resulting in greater economic empowerment
for women, and hence, the right decision making for their children.
Things
were different till a generation back when there weren't too many working
mothers. Mothers had little say in financial matters then. Their roles were
restricted to cooking and other domestic chores. And most importantly, they
raised daughters in the same manner as they were raised. Narrating the same
folklore that were often typically biased against women. That perhaps gave
birth to two kinds of women. One that was born to rebel, and the other that was
expected to remain meek. Stepping out of the threshold has definitely helped
matters for women as they are also aware how the real world functions.
Rural
women and their counterparts dwelling in urban slums are much more vulnerable
to their surrounding circumstances. Human trafficking is a major problem in
cities and girls dwelling in slums are most at risk. Their mothers spent almost
the entire day working as domestic helps. And very few are able to complete
primary education because of gender disparity. These girls are married prior to
their age and also have children early. Like the previous generation, these
girls too start working as domestic helps. Thus the cycle continues. Apart from
lack of education, they also suffer from health hazards.
SONGSOPTOK: Does
the girl child have equal access to education in your country irrespective of
economic or social status? What are the main factors that affect the equality
or inequality of access to education?
KOLPITA
BASU: We are living in the
21st century. It is a century where technology has made major inroads. We are
living in a digital age, which has enabled easy and quick access to information
within nanoseconds. The Indian government has promised to digitize the entire
nation by 2017. That would technically mean empowerment of every soul
inhabiting this great country. But even as we inch closer to the
super-technological age, we are found wanting in many basic areas. And one such
area is gender parity. Empowerment of the girl child is still a big issue in India,
and every government during the Union Budget lays special emphasis on it,
allotting funds to educate the girl child and giving her the right nutrition.
Attitudes are changing in rural India, I agree, and statistics may show some
improvement. Yet, a lot still needs to be done.
Though
both the girl and boy child start attending primary schools in rural India,
domestic expectations, social safety and infrastructure barriers become major
impediments for the former and most girls are forced to drop out of schools
before they reach the age of 14. The same holds true for girl children dwelling
in urban slums.
Let's
now take the case of urban middle class India. Here, education till the college
level is no longer an impediment for girls. Urban parents these days hold their
daughters in parity with their sons. Though marriage still remains a foremost
consideration. I would say urban middle class parents have moved forward and
now show less restraint towards their daughters' ambitions. Parents with means
have no issue with their daughters pursuing higher education. More urban
parents are valuing the merit of their daughters today.
SONGSOPTOK: Do
you think that women, contrary to men, always have to make a choice between
home life and professional career? Is it fair either on men or women? What is
your personal experience?
KOLPITA
BASU: Yes, unfortunately
women still have to make that choice, even today. The primary reason being that
men have not been mentally trained to look after a home. This training ought to
start right from childhood. And no one can train better than a mother. If a
mother treats both her son and daughter equally and explains the value of good
housekeeping to both, the son can grow up to be equally responsible towards his
home after marriage and fatherhood. That will also take away the pressure from
the woman who has to juggle both her career and home. But that still seems some
utopic years away.
While
many mothers have raised their daughters at par with their sons, they have
failed to raise their sons at par with their daughters. It is here that the
problem lies.
The
concept that men still have to be traditional breadwinners, and continue with
their jobs, no matter how much they want to give up, is not at all fair. Both
women and men must have equal rights to make that choice. And women should not
expect men to build the world they want, they should rather contribute
themselves towards creating it.
My
personal experience is most liberating as both my husband and I have the choice
to work as long as we enjoy working. We take equal interest in our housework.
SONGSOPTOK: Detailed
studies have shown that there are very few women across the world occupy really
top positions both in the private and public sectors. How do you explain this
fact? Do you think that women are less qualified to hold top jobs or are there
other explanatory factors?
KOLPITA
BASU: Women are more than
qualified to head top corporate and government positions. Hewlett Packard CEO
Meg Whitman, General Motors CEO Mary Barra, IBM CEO and managing director Ginni
Rometty, PepsiCo CEO Indra Nooyi, Facebook COO Sheryl Sandberg and Yahoo CEO
Marissa Mayer are some of the most successful women in corporate America.
India's first woman prime minister Indira Gandhi, former British prime minister
Margaret Thatcher and former Israeli prime minister Golda Meir had all shown
the world their true mettle. When it came to tough decision making, these
female politicians stood firm as a rock.
Yet,
they are a small speck in a vast ocean. They also had what many women do not
have, that is the strong support of the men in their lives.
What
has held most women back from occupying top positions is their households.
Between the home and the world, the obvious choice becomes the home. As I have
said in the aforementioned answer, as long as men do not take up equal
responsibility in looking after the household, women will continue to step back
even after crossing the threshold and achieving through merit.
The
second most important reason of course is the absence of a conducive working
environment. The compromise has to be made if the children are small and
offices don't have flexible hours for working mothers. Most offices in India do
not have crèches that would enable mothers to work and be with their children
simultaneously.
Women
working in news desks often have to quit after delivery as the work demands
night shifts, which becomes next to impossible for new mothers.
Lastly,
bias against women in society and the workplace are a major hindrance towards
attaining top corporate and government positions. Here the attitude becomes
chauvinistic.
SONGSOPTOK: Even
in the advanced countries in the world, there is a large disparity between the
number of men and women in political parties resulting in an
under-representation of women in governments and elected councils. Do you agree
with this point of view? What in your opinion are the main reasons?
KOLPITA
BASU: Yes I agree that
disparity exists even in advanced countries. There is a large
under-representation of women in governments and elected councils. I think it
is largely a problem of societal attitudes, which needs to change.
SONGSOPTOK: Do
you think a larger participation and presence of women in all domains –
economic, social and political- are actually required? Would it substantially
improve the nature and quality of services and make the society a better place?
KOLPITA
BASU: Yes of course that
would change society for the better. More participation from women in economic,
political and social sectors is absolutely necessary to achieve an equal
society. That would change perceptions about men and women and it would create
an environment with less prejudices. It would enable equal participation in
domestic chores as well. And no work would be considered less important.
SONGSOPTOK: Do
you think that for women the choice of a career and that of a family life with
children should be mutually exclusive? Do you think that women who opt for both
are not totally successful in either sphere? What is your own experience?
KOLPITA
BASU: I don't agree with the
view that women with career and children aren't totally successful. The CEOs I
mentioned above all have children and that hasn't deterred them in achieving
their goals. As for myself, I haven't faced any such problem as I do not have
children. What is required is a social support system. Perhaps the lack of that
deters women from becoming totally successful as many have to quit their jobs
to raise their children. I, however, had a male colleague who did just the
opposite by quitting his job to look after his newly-born son even as his wife
took up a full-time job as a photographer.
SONGSOPTOK: What
is your opinion about the role played by the mother in bringing up children? Do
you think that mothers should take more responsibility for the well-being of
the children more than the father given that other than breast feeding, almost
every other responsibility can be equally shared between the parents? Please
explain your answer.
KOLPITA
BASU: No, I think both
parents have equal responsibility in bringing up their children. However, the
onus to raise and look after the well-being of children still lies on the
mother as society is quick to point fingers at her if something goes wrong with
the children. This is extremely unfair. But the attitude can only change if
more women occupy the outside sphere and more men share the domestic
responsibilities.
SONGSOPTOK: “Women
have been called queens for a long time, but the kingdom given them isn't worth
ruling” said famous American writer Louisa M Alcott. Do you agree? What, in
your perception, is the kingdom given to women?
KOLPITA
BASU: The kingdom, or rather
queendom, given to women is the home and the kitchen. So that she rules and
serves there and continues to expect the same from the next generation of women
who come to live in that 'Kingdom'.
SONGSOPTOK: Do
you agree that professional women have to work at least twice as hard as men to
attain credibility in her chosen career? What is your personal experience? Do
you think that it is a rule rather than an exception? What in your opinion
needs to be done to bring greater equality in the workplace?
KOLPITA
BASU: Attitudes have to change
first. A workplace can't change if society doesn't change. You have to
understand that men and women will behave as they have been treated in their
homes. In an office, there are people from different backgrounds and education.
Each person has his or her own view on things. If a person was raised to
believe that women are inferior to men, then he will bring this attitude to his
workplace. And in case he occupies a senior position, he may even influence his
decision against a well-deserved and talented woman employee in favour of a
less-deserving male candidate. So that will be damaging both to the
organisation as well as to the woman employee.
Hence,
in situations such as these, professional women have to work doubly hard to
attain credibility. More so if the women are self-employed because gaining
trust is the most important aspect. So it is a cycle that has to begin inside
the household and carried forward throughout the school and college days and
maintained at the workplace and home.
SONGSOPTOK: Women
who choose to be ‘homemakers’ often feel that they are not respected by society
in general since they do not go out to earn money, though they probably have to
work harder and for longer hours. Would you agree? What needs to be done to
really valorize the homemakers?
KOLPITA
BASU: In India, homemakers
are valorised more than working women. And I will not say they are not
respected. However, they are looked down upon by men as a class that, according
to them, 'don't understand matters beyond the household '. Such is the
hypocrisy that if these homemakers step out of the threshold and start earning
a few pennies, it threatens these men.
Society
should acknowledge the 24-hour job done by homemakers and accept the fact that
because of them the household is running smoothly without the others having to
care a hoot.
SONGSOPTOK: On
the other hand, working women very often have to juggle their professional and
personal lives to be perfect both at home and at the workplace. What is your
personal experience? Do you think that a woman really have to be perfect in
both spheres or is this idea self-imposed? In your society, what is expected of
working women?
KOLPITA
BASU: In my society, women
have to be perfectionists. That is the expectation. They are expected to be
brilliant homemakers, impeccable at their office jobs, hands down at any job
they undertake. However, no person is perfect. And too much expectation causes
undue stress. Many suffer from hyper tension due to unexpected pressure to
excel both at the workplace and home. This often takes a toll on their health.
Insomnia and skipping of the menses are now common maladies among young urban
Indian women. Behind the layers of compact and the mascara hide the dilemma of
failing to become the super woman. That is the real dilemma.
KOLPITA:
Lives in India where women are still
breaking the glass ceiling. Some have reached heights, others are yet to make
it for lack of actual opportunities. She considers merit to be the sole
benchmark for achieving excellence for both men and women. According to her,
owing to steep prejudices and an almost absence of equal opportunities in most
cases, reservations have become necessary. The case of 33% reservation for
women in parliament is one such example. She believes gender parity at the
workplace is yet to be satisfactorily, if not fully, achieved. The ratio of
male to female students in IITs too is uneven, with scales tilted in favor of
male students.
We
sincerely thank you for your time and hope we shall have your continued
support.
Aparajita Sen:
Editor, Songsoptok.)