Every year as the D day approaches, I mean the Valentine's Day;
people start gearing up with their individual reactions to the day. The staunch
moral police come out on the streets banning the celebrations and calling it a
cultural sabotage. On the other hand the skinny jeans, cropped topped, girls
and boys put on their tinted glasses of love and start buying cards and roses
for their Valentine. The third group prefer to watch the drama from the
sidelines, holding nothing against Valentine yet not partaking in it. They are
like two teams in the social arena to prove a point with an indifferent
referee. The perfect love triangle indeed. In a way both the warring sides make
this day immensely popular with each passing year. Both lack in clarity of why
they shun or celebrate Valentine's Day. Shun it only because the concept is
foreign or celebrate only because it is fashionable to do so. ? The third set
of people I suppose keep calm till Cupid strikes! In this love triangle the
origin of Valentine gets blurred. The Feast of Saint Valentine or Valentine's
Day is essentially a day to celebrate love. Love in every style can be
celebrated, but on this particular day romantic affections takes precedence
over other love ties.
Having been a married woman for more than half my life certainly
does not qualify me as any great exponent of love and relationship. There is no
should or shouldn't, love is just an emotion and if the heart desires to
profess love on any particular day so be it. Given a chance I will go back all
the way and do the same things in life again and again, from falling in love,
learning in love, and living in love. Growing up on songs like “love me tender
love me sweet ", and many such beautiful love songs, I couldn't have
helped but become a romantic at heart. I belong to the generation where love
was supposed to mean a special and everlasting sentiment for that special
someone. But, yes the 'but ' does come in life every time and the 'but '
teaches us maturity and reality and romantic illusions do fade a little.
Our next generation is smarter than us. They do not attach undue
sentimentality to love. Boys and girls still do get attracted but the choices
they make are with open mind and clarity. The priorities of life of the
educated youth today is to find true friendship, happy relationship, rather
than make a Romeo Juliet love story.
Every couple have their special moments, days, or incidents to
cherish. That day when the heart raced beyond control, that day when one felt
weak in the knee, that day when one cried or laughed without reason. That
special day is your own Valentine's Day. In the hum drum running of life the
warm memories of that day or days are often forgotten or even if remembered it
is not celebrated. Love becomes a habit, not something you rejoice and feel
constantly. In such a busy world with super busy people if the world outside
generates a day to celebrate love, why be satirical or cynical about it .If a
day is celebrated around the world as a day of love and as an individual anyone
has the time and desire to be part of the celebration it will only add smiles
between the miles of this world.
No concept is foreign in today's date and time. There are
Grandparent's Day, Mother's Day, Father's Day, Daughter's Day, Son's Day and
many more. Human relations are most tender and precious. They need constant
nurturing, care, understanding, sacrifices, and adjustments, to cement the
bonding between individuals. No matter how strongly we feel for each other the
feelings also need to be expressed. There is no running away from broken homes,
broken marriages, alienated parents, abandoned children. In a world so busy and
grim it wouldn't hurt to celebrate a day for a relationship.
"Hallmark Holiday” is a new concept where the occasion is
generated by a company to sell their merchandise. We can smirk or laugh at it
but the very existence of this situation does tell a story of its own. The
extreme situation when one has to rely only on a card to feel or profess love
and care can be shallow and depressing. Love needs more than a card, it is an
expression between two people. Around this time of the year all over the radio
channels and television channels, one can hear endless talks and music
surrounding Valentine's Day. Making it sound like a seasonal affair by which
one is obliged to get affected. But in reality there are hundreds of people who
are not in a romantic relationship or any other special relationship. It can
happen that some may start feeling a sense of lacking by this media generated
hype over certain days. The extreme of consumerism at times becomes insensitive
to real life situations. They want to sell life in a glittering gift box. But
life is not a piece of merchandise. Life is very simple, feelings are simpler,
and it is to be felt deep within like “music of the murmuring spring”.
Valentine's Day or the Valentine way is not the only day and way
to celebrate love, for love was there forever. Love awaits in the bend of a
river, in the glow of a setting sun, in the smooth valleys of the green mountains,
in the darkest grey clouds, in the songs of the birds, in the unspoken promises
of life. To think that love will unfold only on a particular day is wrong. Let
the day happen amidst the myth and reality, let the day come and go, for it is
nothing more than the joy of life between a dawn and dusk.
Some argue about the concept, some hold debates, and in extreme
situations some oppose the day by resorting to vandalism. One can stop being
aggressively resistant towards every new concept. In a world where we talk of
global community, global citizenship, Valentine's Day is as much a day of the
east as it is of the west. Yet celebrating a day without understanding the
essence of love is another extreme of cultural fashionista. And a total apathy to the things around us is
also in need of change. Thus Valentine Day with all its well-meaning message
gets caught in this love triangle. And like all good love stories here too love
triumphs.
This is romantic me finally signing off humming a favorite
Bangla song " Aaj shobar ronge rong melaate hobe " ( today I need to
blend in with the colors around me ) and waiting yet for my first Valentine
card .
SANGEETA BRAJABASI
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