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  • CARLA MASSEY aka MISTEREE

    SongSoptok | 12/10/2014 |




    TORN

    Our love affair began with the melodic creations designed by our sacred verses
    Dispersed
    Not sure if the affair was a blessing or a curse
    At night I would drown in my emotions and empty them on the notebook paper line by line
    Anxiously awaiting for your intense documented romantic reply
    The mailman appearing on my doorstep was the highlight of my eye
    But even more when he would smile and say I do have the envelope you're so eagerly looking for
    You would pour your adornment for me
    As we anticipated how our first meeting would be and I would perpetuate there was no risk to take since you professed each feeling with such detailed meaning
    But when I rushed to the mailbox today
    The mailman's demeanor was displaced
    As if he knew what the letter's words were going to say
    It read our affair must end
    He met a new love
    And he said sorry
    And left it open ended
    My initial reaction
    I'm going to be ok
    So I sat the letter down
    Letting the hurt infiltrate
    My soul not just hurts but aches
    I took the letter and read it once more
    Then
    Without a second take
    Ripped it
    In several pieces
    All those moments spent
    Were wasted
    My anger has to cease this
    I call my ex
    Told him I want only sex
    He obliged
    But before he gets there I have a sense of pride so I decide
    To rip my shirt multiple times
    He will think its sexy
    I will know it represents my mind
    So he comes and goes
    I act as though I am grand
    Out of habit I pick up the notebook
    And my pen
    And wrote
    Dear
    Well I had to rip up that page
    And many once again
    Ripping
    Equates my own love life
    Transformed to
    Torn
    **************************************************



    TROUBLED PARADISE

    The softness in my heart crystallized to pure ice and the indestructible pressure has profound feelings detrimental because you're the vice that leads me from solace to nice my relentless shyness transforms the nice look to calmly fade you see I thought you were the one for me but I am unsure now did I fabricate an imagery expecting to excel to holy matrimony what's unsettling no hunches or hints are showing steps towards that reality our status contradicts my thesis of what I feel and felt many unaccounted for minutes distinctly tested the compelled strife of my desire in my heart to suspend in this foresight but I made sure to endure the thunderous roars and the mountainous monumental winds as they began to thrash against my windows and doors my refusal to run made me stand in the stillness as the rain poured splashing all of my entity and physically pushing me I am weakening our paradise isn't appearing as the beauty it was in the beginning why is this storm invading our serenity I am trying to comprehend are we going to be married or is our destiny coming to an end so much uncertainty I am feeding just play our song maybe that's what we both need to get back together and along

    **************************************************


    MY FAULT

    Baby I know the words that I spewed
    I complained you misconstrued
    But really you didn't
    I just didn't mean for them to hurt you
    Its just that things are complicated and my feelings shamefully have vacated
    to another space
    Look at me I am trying to save face
    I am stuck my admission of this hurts me to my core
    Everytime I bring this up
    You non-verbally cast off you're bored
    I feel our relationship is stagnate and going in the direction of no place
    The downess of your head shows me you would rather I lie instead
    But that's not me
    I lay next to you but I am feeling empty emotionally
    I need the fire back unsure you desire that
    You appear complacent also
    So why put on a fake Colgate smile while inside I'm feeling awful
    Many times I want to say something
    But I fight to provide this insight
    Knowing it always creates more distance
    Between us
    Which then stifles us to reunite
    Or ignite the fire
    I know we both aspire
    I want you to help me to
    Love you
    Beyond what we agreed upon rightfully in the beginning
    Take my hand and reintroduce yourself to me
    I want to relearn you
    We both evolved
    Your issues and concerns I want to help solve
    And picture
    Our relationship now is weaker
    But with a newfound sensation jamming
    Our union will no longer be standing
    Dormant
    We become fluid
    Flowing beauty
    Our caressing is sharing unselfishly
    The warmness is sparing our solidity from dying
    Effortlessly creating a tighter bond
    Without even trying
    I want you to know me
    Every ounce
    Tour my infinity
    Infinitely
    We can do this
    Not by you
    Not by me
    But we
    Its my fault its like this
    I think
    As I kiss your cheek
    In this moment let's journey
    To our everlasting destiny

    [MISTEREE]




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