SHEENA MOSIER

NEVER ENOUGH

I married him and made a home with him,
so far away from my own family. We
raised our girls together when he was...
home.

While on his trips, he would think it
was okay to go out to the bars or
to go to dinner and movies with
his female friends.

All this was done while I was home,
taking care of my girls, my job and
life. He would get upset at me
because I did not like him going
out and having fun without me.

Over the years, it just became the
same routine. He was off doing
his military duties, I stayed home
doing all the rest.

Soon the girls were grown and we
were blessed with our first grand
child. Life was good, we were
all together.

Once we moved into a new house,
to accommodate our grown family,
we were almost through, time
to spend together in his retirement
years, or so I thought.

It didn't happen, what he wanted
took over our marriage and soon
they all left. He was not happy
with his life and job so he
crawled into a bottle to escape.

He buried his tears in his whiskey.
Those of us who were left were in
his way. It didn't matter what we
did, he didn't like it.

I tried to bring him out of his
funk but he became verbally
abusive and finally, I just
couldn't take it any longer.

I had feelings and my own
wants and needs. I wanted
simple, he wanted more,
it didn't matter what,
nothing was ever enough
for him.

I left him, I wanted to go home
and visit my family. To spend
time with my grandmother
before she passed away.

It was only going to be a leave of
absence from work, but he
informed me that I was going to
have to find a job back there
and it was only going to be a
temporary move for me.

Nope, that was not enough so I
applied for a job and got it. After
all that I sacrificed for him, he
couldn't just give me time with
my family and next thing I know,
I am a cheater and I left him
for another man.

I had lots of friends back home but
nope, I was supposedly on the hunt.
What a joke! There were no men
in my life, but he didn't believe it.

When my girls were expecting, I
decided to come back. He said
we would work things out and
go to counselling. It never
happened.

I finally moved to a separate room.
After much thinking, and his lack
of effort in trying, I asked him for
a divorce. This wasn't even a
life.

Neither of us were happy, and while
he wanted more, I had had enough.
This brings me to now. It has been
a rough couple years but here I
am.

It was hard to break away from him
after so many years but I did and I
am stronger for it. Now I can live
a simplistic life.

[SHEENA  MOSIER.]